Where did April go?

It's mid-May, and I'm not sure where April went.
School is flying by; only two more months until summer! Here are my after school kiddos:


We've all gotten quite comfortable with each other.


Sometimes they like to take over and teach. We were talking about fortunes, playing a game that predicts what will happen in your life using the sentence "You will _____." I wrote several examples on the board:

• You will win 2mil in the lotto.
• You will play professional baseball (with LG Twins, Korean team)
• You will marry G-dragon (famous Korean pop-star)

One of the kiddos took over my black marker with a red marker.

Clearly they do not like the LG twins, and clearly they have been misinformed about what it'd be like to be married to me...

In other news, the new English Classroom is up and running. We had an opening ceremony and everything. Here are 2 of my 3 co-teachers...


Jennifer (in white) is fluent in English, and is a total god-send. I dont actually teach with her, but we spend ample amounts of time together outside the classroom (and sometimes outside school). Mrs. Pak is in gray, and we teach 4th and 5th grade together. We've got a great system: she prepares the lesson, I teach it. Works great.

Here's the new classroom. Rough life, eh?


The giant TV is a touch-screen. It's my favorite.
And see where the "Room" is? With the bed, TV, couch, and desk?
Yeah... all my students think that's my HOME.

"Teacher home? Teacher home?" I kept getting asked the first few weeks the classroom was opened. Yes, retards. This is where I live.

Pre-April snow brings.... yellow dust?

March 23
When it snows, it pours...


March 24
Yellow dust. Thanks Gobi Desert.


March 27
An afternoon in the life of a public school teacher. After school.

Notice how they shoved the entire classroom forward 10 feet to clear a space to play... but the best part: they carried that ping-pong table up FOUR flights of stairs.

March 31
Sunrise service. 4:30am.


I ventured inside...

...and called Jennifer (co-teacher). "I'm waiting for you in the back of the room," I yelled over the music. But we couldn't find each other. Apparently this was the OVERFLOW room.

THIS was the main auditorium. People arrive here around 3:30am to reserve seats. Jennifer arrives at 4am and the closest she can get is seating along the side.


I ended up going back the next morning. Jennifer called over the camera man and told him to take a picture of me... AWKWARD.

모전여전

BUT WORTH IT because he posted them on her church's website, just like this, and beneath our side-by-side photos he wrote: 모전여전

Roughly translated: the daughter takes after her mother.

BAHAHAAA.... I love Korea. Jennifer and I laughed for a good three minutes when we saw this. I mean I know I look a little Asian, but really?

As promised...

Meet class 4-8.
They are unlike any class I've had here.
They are hyper active.
They are high maintenance.
They are high energy.
They are enthusiastic, vibrant little rascals,
and they are really really really into...

Kelly Teacher.


We're on Lesson 2 this week: Don't Do That!
Every lesson has a song, and 4-8 had me heaving in laughter. I've never seen a group of kids so stoked about some lame song.
(I also love how my co-teacher wrote "Don't Do That?" on the board)

Oh no, don't do that! Oh no, don't do that! Oh no, don't do that! It's not OK, don't do that! Don't run, don't run, don't run in the classroom. Don't jump, don't jump, don't jump in the classroom. Oh no, don't do that! Oh no, don't do that! Oh no, don't do that! It's not OK, don't do that!

Okay, last story.

4-8 has, in my opinion, the most high maintenance student in the school. He was one of my 3rd graders last semester and I about killed him. This time around, I chose to goof off back rather then seethe in anger... and oddly enough, it's working.

Well, I thought it was. I thought I was doing something that made him calm down and listen. Until three weeks ago, when I realized that what's working is the little lady who sits next to him.

EVERY week, this happens.
EVERY week, it cracks me up.
THIS week, I filmed it for you.

Maybe you have to be here to see it: she next to Mr. High Maintenance and for forty looong minutes, makes sure his face is glued to the desk. She uses all methods. Hitting, smacking, smothering (she literally stands up and covers him), and gentle patting. Then she'll catch me looking at her, laughing, at which point she (1) gives that adorable, innocent smile (2) starts patting his head with her right hand and (3) rests her chin in her left hand. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. She's so consistent, I love it.

Incredible.
I don't know what kind of super power she has..... but I want it.

Crowds... of a different kind.

I arrived in Korea just in time for the start of second semester (Sept-Dec). I taught English camps in the morning during January, and worked 9-noon the first two months of 2010. It was rough. March 2nd marked the beginning of a new school year: students have moved up a grade, I'm teaching different grades, the English classroom is getting a makeover, and I have three new co-teachers.

Things look and feel remarkably similar to last September; many things have changed, requiring much adaptability on my part. But one thing is remarkably different: this time around, I'm known. No longer do I wander around the hallways, feeling lost in a sea of Korean children; these days I have to wade through swarm of hugs to get to the next class. Especially when I walk through the 4th grade hallway. Those little buggers amaze me with their unending reservoir of sheer excitement simply because I walk into the room. I'll take a video to prove it: they cheer for at least 10 seconds every time they see me.

I couldn't be more pleased that the students finally feel comfortable around me. It took many long months of smiles, hugs, and an unending reservoir of sheer excitement to get 700+ kiddos to warm up to me.

And warm up have they EVER.
Actually,
these days,
I'm thinkin they're a little too warm for my liking.

Case in point (I'll give you one example from each grade)(and also, this all happened in the SAME week):

Grade 4
One day I wore my contacts. I always wear my glasses. I dont wear much makeup, and the makeup I do wear certainly isn't trying to "cover up" anything. The first class asked my co-teacher why I wasnt wearing face makeup. I told them I didn't need it, I was beautiful without it. They gasped in horror. I then turned to all the 10 yr old girls and told them they, too, were beautiful and didnt need make up. Some of them fell out of their seat and rolled around the floor shrieking. Suffice it to say that Korean advertising has an agenda, and it reaches all the way down to 8, 9, and 10 yr old girls. And, it works. Unfortunately.

Anyway. The next class, one little gaffer was bold enough to walk to the front of the room, touch my face (under my eyes) and ask my co-teacher why there were dark circles. Well, sweet muffin, we all have wrinkles and splotches and weird things on our face, but most women "cover it up" and I choose not to...

Grade 5
My hair is finally long enough to pull it back a bit. Which I've done a few times, and I've received myriad compliments. Apparently, this was the first time this particular 5th grade class saw it, and as most children do, they noticed immediately. One boy said something in Korean, the class hooted in laughter, and one of the more fluent students graciously translated, "Teacher, he says you look like a man!" And why is that, my sweet little muffin? "Your new hair fashion!"

Grade 6
Winter in Korea. Cold. Long. I brought a pea-coat, and I only brought one. As it is usually very cold inside the school, I have it on most of the time. The day after the Grade 5 hair comment, one of the 6th grade students bluntly asked, "Teacher, why do you always wear the same clothes?" Well, sweet muffin, I'm really poor and haven't any money to buy other clothes! Can you donate to my cause? (... It wasn't even worth wasting breath trying to explain to him that THIS is a coat, and I have only one because I only brought TWO suitcases with me from home and I couldn't FIT more than one, and not to worry because though I may look the same on the outside, I am QUITE proactive about changing the clothes I wear UNDERNEATH the coat...)

Sigh.
These kiddos. Rough crowd.
Now, I have to make sure to
..wear my glasses on Thursdays
..dress warmly on Tuesdays (and ditch the coat)
..and straighten my hair on Mondays.

I've never felt so insecure in my life.

Crowds and other Korean delicacies

It always feels crowded here. And the crowds are exhausting. A fun Korean fact: bumping, nudging, or flat-out shoving is normal. No one thinks twice about it - except the Westerner who is quite used to her "personal bubble." But alas, I've been bumped, nudged, and shoved so many times the last six months I've grown quite used to it. Observe:

This is Myeongdong -- a popular, cutting edge shopping district in Seoul. I was sitting on the second floor of a coffee shop, digging deep to find more energy, pondering whether I wanted to go back outside and walk around in that, again. This was back in December, when my bubble still felt violated on a daily basis.

Winter here has been bitterly cold. This was a crowded ice festival we went to in January, on the east side of the country. This was also the day "slide" was added to the "bump, nudge, shove" list. We got taken out by people quite literally sliding into us.

January and February I hit the slopes, which - you guessed it - were crowded (I took up boarding this season because I couldn't find enough room on the hill to ski). I tell you the truth: I have NEVER seen anything like a Korean ski hill. I've also never seen such a busy ski patrol. People were skiing, boarding, and sliding into each other left and right. Again, no one seems to thinks twice about it: just get up, wipe off the snow, and continue on with your day until you get taken out again 38 seconds later. If I were to start my own business here,I'd open clinics at the base of ski resorts. I'd make bank.

Last weekend I finally made it to a well known flea market in Seoul. Quite the overstimulating experience. It's rare these days for Koreans to buy anything secondhand, thus the market is a treasure trove of trinkets. I was thoroughly exhausted after two short hours; I haven't been pushed around that much since my rugby days!

Even the meals feel crowded.
This is a traditional (and typical) Korean meal -- complete with a zillion delicious side dishes. Stop by for a visit, I'll take you to a few of my favorite places... (hint, hint)

Besides the crowds, life here is fairly normal. I spend all my time with people. On Monday I hang with my favorite family: the Stewarts. Zach's eleventh birthday is this week, and we threw him a big surprise party on Sunday. Look at the little stud, surrounded by his "best friends in Korea." Rough life, Zach... rough life.

As you can see, the numbers have grown. The gals went from two this time last year, to five, to eight, and now we're pushing fifteen. Whitney had to get a new apartment to fit all the people on Wednesday nights. But growth is to be expected when God is breathing on something.

One weekend in February we crashed Scott and Dionne's apartment, where we laughed, cried, worshiped, ate, slept, and laid many-a-hand in an effort to encourage and edify one another. 'Twas delightful, and another weekend is already in the works.

A recent favorite in the new year: my neighbors. We met Ashley and JJ at the end of 2009, and quickly discovered they live in the next apartment building. They also love board games. Charissa and I live for board games. For two months, the four of us have been getting together for game night on Tuesdays. They bring the wine, we bring the dessert.

Oh, before I forget. Turns out I brought a friend back from Thailand with me. I named him Wormy. Thanks to Asian medicine, he's been flushed out of my system now, but I thought some of you would like to know. I mean, how often do you know someone who contracts a hookworm and lives to tell about it?!

Just kidding. They're not that bad. I kinda miss the little sucker (literally).

The first weekend of March was Korean Flag Day. We went to the park, where hundreds of flags filled the sky and the sounds of Korean festivities echoed throughout the air. The costumes were vibrant and the people were joyful.

And this man ate raw pig. Mmm...

I, on the other hand, found a little friend and was quite content to play with her for the rest of the afternoon. She laughed gleefully and I was giddy. The color coordination was totally planned.

A Korean Christmas

I felt a bit like Santa today. We've been testing the students for the last few weeks, and today's test was on Lesson 8.

Kelly Teacher: What do you want for Christmas?
Student: I want a ________.
(cell phone, touch phone, iPhone, mp3, mp4, Wii, etc -- you know, "normal" presents for Korean kiddos)
Kelly Teacher: How much is it?
Student: It's ______ won.

Seems appropriate to wear a Santa hat tomorrow during the test, right? I'll try to get my co-teacher to sneak a photo.

The Christmas season in Korea has felt fairly normal, despite of the lack of eggnog, peppermint mochas, and Caucasian Santa Clauses. I've received wonderful care packages full of delightful American delicacies (Mom's homemade power bars, Hot Tamales, REESE'S PEANUT BUTTER CUPS, beef jerky, etc). I managed to get my hands on a 4ft Christmas tree, some ornaments and some lights, and now I never want to leave my apartment. It's absolutely freezing, all of Seoul is lit up like a Christmas tree, materialism in the markets abounds, and I've even seen snow a few times.


If I've learned anything in my time here, it's that Korean's don't do anything halfway.

Case in point: This is a picture of a Christmas store. It is packed so full, you can hardly walk down the narrow excuse for an aisle.

And I loved every minute of it.


Last weekend, we celebrated Christmas at Kim and Todd's place.










We had an old fashioned Christmas party. We wore plaid and/or ugly Christmas sweaters (Simon wore his Santa suit), ate pot roast, drank hot cocoa, sang Christmas carols, and watched Christmas movies.

But the best part of Christmas in Korea came earlier that day.

Katie and Charissa.
For the last two months,
they've been stalkin' and talkin' to ALL our families,
getting the low down on Christmas traditions
and asking for holiday letters.

On Sunday afternoon, at their instruction, we convened at my place. We entered into a candle-lit room and were immediately greeted by soothing Christmas classics from Frank, Etta, and Bing. The tree was lit and nine stockings proudly displayed each of our names. For the next two hours, wine and tears flowed as we took turns opening our letters and reading them aloud, and digging through our stockings, laughing together at small inside jokes that were waiting inside. We may all be away from our mothers, brothers, fathers and sisters, but we most certainly are not lacking family this Christmas. We're just a few days away now -- some gals have flown back home, others will stay, and some have even decided to come to Thailand with me at the end of the week.

All I know is I've never been happier in my life.

Family Photo

Christmas 2009
Seoul, South Korea

After School Class

Meet Ralphie. He's twelve.

He is one of my 750+ students. We also see each other after school for English Class.

Most days, I don't think he likes me. Most days, I think he's making fun of me to the other boys in the after school class. Most days, he just simply pisses me off.

But TODAY, Ralphie made my day. The 5th grade students made "mini-books" this week to practice using past tense verbs. "What did you do on Sunday, Monday, etc etc" They had to write a sentence and draw a picture. Most students wrote things like "I went to church/I went to school/I studied English/I played baseball/I ate lunch/I watched a movie/etc etc," using the simple, easy verbs we've been studying.

Here's what my creative, devious little Ralphie came up with:


Sunday: I killed a rabbit. Monday: I baked a rabbit.

Tuesday: I ate the rabbit.

Friday: I made rabbit for jaket.

Saturday: I wore rabbit for jaket.

Gahhh hahah I still can't stop laughing. AND CHECK OUT THE DETAILED PICTURES. I love the serious face he's making in these photos. He's so into himself. Little boys are little boys no matter what country you're in, eh?

Meet Tom (left) and Jason.

Any of you that have skyped with me while I'm at school have undoubtedly met Jason. A sweet, sensitive, bright, witty young dude. He's my favorite. And that's saying a lot, considering I have 750+ kiddos to choose from.

Meet my shadow:

Joy, Mary, Sally.

These little girls follow me around EVERRYYYWHEERREEE. I love it. Can't get enough of em'. Their English isn't very good but they try SO HARD to talk to me. You can tell they want SO BADLY to be liked by me... ah, such a blessing, I love lovin on these three.


Mary is so stinkin cute. Her English needs some work, as evidenced by this worksheet... don't worry, I'm all over it.


Joy is an artist. She's trying to tell me that she saw me that morning on the way to school. But she couldn't figure out how to say it, and I wasn't understanding the usual game of charades, so she drew a picture. Such is my life.

And last, meet Ellen. Ellen is a beautiful, beautiful soul. We had a significant bonding moment last week that still warms my heart: she came to class after school crying, and she didn't know how to tell me what was wrong in English, so I just held her. And no words were needed. The next class she brought me a gift with a note that said "Happy day. I love you! Ellen."


I like to play games with them. Their lives are too serious, going to school from 8am-6 or 7 or 8pm. Or 10pm. Yikes. So my goal as their teacher? I just try and create a space for them to relax and have fun for one hour in their hectic day.

This week, during one of our after school classes, we listened to Korean Pop music (oh it's the WORST... and yet, it's the BEST... it's complicated... it's growing on me... I'm assimilating into the culture... uh oh, Kelly's gonna be a little more Asian when she comes back home...) during class. Ralphie was singing along. It was pretty funny, he knew all the words.


Gotta love Daniel, the goofy (literally) lookin kid in maroon (I know, I'm so bad). I think Daniel has some sort of speech impediment because he literally CAN'T talk right. Which is why he's looking at the camera, knowing that I'm filming without Ralphie knowing, but he doesn't say anything.

Ooooh my life is so funny to me. I'm an English teacher in Korea.

Nuf' said.